All mammals poop in 12 seconds -

- and there’s an equation for the ‘duration of diarrheal defecation’

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Re: All mammals poop in 12 seconds -

#21  Postby Dark energy » Apr 29, 2017 9:57 pm

thread went down the shitter.
And."
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Re: All mammals poop in 12 seconds -

#22  Postby SafeAsMilk » Apr 30, 2017 12:57 am

This thread's amazing. I don't even have to add anything to it, just stand back and let 'er rip.
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Re: All mammals poop in 12 seconds -

#23  Postby Weaver » Apr 30, 2017 4:33 am

SafeAsMilk wrote:This thread's amazing. I don't even have to add anything to it, just stand back and let 'er rip.

I think it's so amazing, I'd advise people to sit down before letting 'er rip.
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Re: All mammals poop in 12 seconds -

#24  Postby laklak » Apr 30, 2017 5:32 pm

I timed the Morning Slider, came in at just over 10 seconds. Espresso, saves two whole seconds every day!
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Re: All mammals poop in 12 seconds -

#25  Postby Mazille » Apr 30, 2017 8:17 pm

I too tried it again today. 10.7 seconds this time. I seem to be more efficient than other mammals.
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Re: All mammals poop in 12 seconds -

#26  Postby laklak » Apr 30, 2017 8:18 pm

Great hinds stink alike.
A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way. - Mark Twain
The sky is falling! The sky is falling! - Chicken Little
I never go without my dinner. No one ever does, except vegetarians and people like that - Oscar Wilde
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Re: All mammals poop in 12 seconds -

#27  Postby Mazille » Apr 30, 2017 8:24 pm

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Re: All mammals poop in 12 seconds -

#28  Postby jamest » Apr 30, 2017 10:42 pm

If this is proved to be a constant like the speed of light, I might have another God argument. Because surely, the universe isn't arsed about how long an organism shits for? Therefore God controls our shit. Therefore God.

I might have to polish it up. :think:

Also I'll need to address the problem of diarrhoea, as someone's bound to hit me with it.
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Re: All mammals poop in 12 seconds -

#29  Postby don't get me started » Apr 30, 2017 10:55 pm

Well, the land of uncooked and undercooked food has taken it's toll once again. (Don't get me started on Japanese food.)
During the night I suffered repeated episodes....I think at peak flow 12 seconds was the interval between evacuations, not the duration thereof.

On a related note, I once devised a handy acronym for giving a full report of toilet activities to one's scatalogically inclined friends. C.L.A.R.T

Colour
Length
Aroma
Resistance
Texture
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Re: All mammals poop in 12 seconds -

#30  Postby jamest » Apr 30, 2017 11:03 pm

My grandfather on my dad's side enjoyed going for a poop for about an hour whilst reading the newspaper on the floor. He proudly announced this at some point.

I remember being impressed... by the quality of his eyesight.
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Re: All mammals poop in 12 seconds -

#31  Postby Weaver » May 01, 2017 2:55 am

jamest wrote:If this is proved to be a constant like the speed of light, I might have another God argument. Because surely, the universe isn't arsed about how long an organism shits for? Therefore God controls our shit. Therefore God.

I might have to polish it up. :think:
And, like all other arguments trying to demonstrate the existence of god, you'd just be polishing a turd.


Also I'll need to address the problem of diarrhoea, as someone's bound to hit me with it.

You worry about getting hit with diarrhea?

You hang out in some strange places. :yuk:
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Re: All mammals poop in 12 seconds -

#32  Postby monkeyboy » May 01, 2017 6:05 am

don't get me started wrote:Well, the land of uncooked and undercooked food has taken it's toll once again. (Don't get me started on Japanese food.)
During the night I suffered repeated episodes....I think at peak flow 12 seconds was the interval between evacuations, not the duration thereof.

On a related note, I once devised a handy acronym for giving a full report of toilet activities to one's scatalogically inclined friends. C.L.A.R.T

Colour
Length
Aroma
Resistance
Texture

That could cause some serious confusion in these parts. Clarts are a colloquial term for trousers, as in "get thi Clarts on" " pull thi clarts up, aah could park me bike in yon."
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Re: All mammals poop in 12 seconds -

#33  Postby Mike_L » May 01, 2017 7:15 am

I remember learning this in dietetics 2nd yr (a long, long time ago)...

The Bristol stool scale

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Re: All mammals poop in 12 seconds -

#34  Postby Fallible » May 01, 2017 10:22 am

They asked me about that before my operation...I had to say which one I was. :doh:
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If I hear that fucking phrase again, this baby's gonna blow
Into a million itsy bitsy tiny pieces, don't you know,
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Re: All mammals poop in 12 seconds -

#35  Postby DavidMcC » May 01, 2017 10:45 am

I find that the time I take depends a lot on the state of my bowels!
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