A report by the former top doctor in the US, Vivek Murthy, says 40% of adults in the US report feeling lonely. Why?

Rates of loneliness have doubled since the 1980s, experts say

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/world-us-canada-42031799/why-an-epidemic-of-loneliness-affects-health

Oh dear.

I have been virtually alone the last nine years and have zero intention of looking for soul mates of either variety
I will continue to be like this till the day I die and it does not bother me at all because it provides me with space
Dying alone does not bother me either because after I do die I will be going to a place of peace for all of eternity
I am not suggesting all lonely people adopt this model because I do not have the moral authority to advise anyone
I am merely saying it works for me and only me probably because I am very unusual and so not like everybody else

I would take exception to what was said by the psychiatrist in that video about lonely people especially with regard to
health. I am in very good shape for an old man [ I am 53 ] I have been walking since I was I9 and shall carry on doing so
till the day I die. I currently do not drink or smoke or take drugs although I do eat junk food for reasons of convenience
Overall I am in very good shape and my lack of friends is having precisely no effect upon my physical and mental health
I really feel for people who are truly lonely but I am not one of them because I actually function better when I am alone

It would actually make a change if there were more positive representations of loneliness in the media rather than the usual
stereotypes that are commonly portrayed. I am as content as anyone and probably moreso than many since my loneliness has zero impact upon my life. Though the correct word here is alone not lonely

I'm not sure why you take exception to what was said about lonely people. You say you are content with being alone. This is not loneliness, which is a feeling of sadness about being alone. In other words, you are not lonely, because you are happy with your situation.

I'm not sure I'd describe sur as happy fal....when I first read his post 15 mins ago my initial reaction was to say "methinks the lady (lol) doth protest too much" but that's a little condescending because sur is my senior, although only 53, and age didn't stop me from being real with theropod. Long way to go for you still I think sur m8.

I reckon a lot of people wouldn't characterise sur as content. Sur is vehement that he in fact is satisfied with like though and that's fine.

Keep It Real wrote:I'm not sure I'd describe sur as happy fal....when I first read his post 15 mins ago my initial reaction was to say "methinks the lady (lol) doth protest too much" but that's a little condescending because sur is my senior, although only 53, and age didn't stop me from being real with theropod. Long way to go for you still I think sur m8.

RS

I have acquired contentment by accepting the world as it is without wishing to change it. I only focus on what I can change which is myself. This has zero impact upon the world as I am detached from it so I see myself as a neutral observer instead
of an active participant in its affairs. I know I am only passing through and that nothing really matters in the grand scheme
of things only in the here and now so I try to avoid getting involved. The sense of detachment is very good for for my state
of mind so naturally I seek to maintain and maximise it. It only works for me so I am not suggesting it for anyone else. How others live their life is a matter for them. I have no real life experience and so I cannot give any advice even if I wanted to

Keep It Real wrote:I'm not sure I'd describe sur as happy fal....when I first read his post 15 mins ago my initial reaction was to say "methinks the lady (lol) doth protest too much" but that's a little condescending because sur is my senior, although only 53, and age didn't stop me from being real with theropod. Long way to go for you still I think sur m8.

I'm taking him at his word, as it has proved pointless to do otherwise. In any event, it doesn't alter my response. He says he is content with being alone, so is not lonely, so has no reason to take exception to what is said about lonely people.

I was just trying to emphasise the distinction between being alone and being lonely
As for the other thing that is not true but since I no longer argue I will just let it go

You didn't emphasis the distinction, just the opposite - you conflated the two. I don't know what 'other thing' you're talking about.

theropod wrote:

who? You or me?

It's good to have a little bit of lonely every now and again, makes you appreciate the not lonely times more. I have a six day lonely coming up, Mrs. Lak leaves for the UK Tuesday to go to her Gran's funeral, returns the following Monday. I'll be quite busy, though.

laklak wrote:It's good to have a little bit of lonely every now and again, makes you appreciate the not lonely times more. I have a six day lonely coming up, Mrs. Lak leaves for the UK Tuesday to go to her Gran's funeral, returns the following Monday. I'll be quite busy, though.

I think in order for something to really be precious, there ends up being a bittersweet element to it. I like a lot of alone time but that makes me that much more appreciative of mrs BWE because she gives me more space than she probably wants to and both of us are happier even with the bittersweet.

I hate being with people and I hate being alone. Just can't win.

That reminds me of a conversation I had with somebody in the flesh. He said "yeah yeah, you're always right and I'm always wrong" and I replied, tongue in cheek "No no; you're always right and I'm always wrong" and he replied "No....." and I said "see? you can't win". Perhaps the two problems are related Rumraket.

If it was an absolute choice between the two I would choose no people every time. The freedom of being entirely
detached from every one is the best way for me to grow. I am so glad I am on the outside as I have nothing to lose
I used to think that it was a disadvantage but now I see it as a strength and I am not even conscious of it any more
I achieved this without reading a single self help book but simply letting go and not being afraid of what is to come
My mind knows this existence is only temporary so it does not waste mental energy on making me hold on too much

laklak wrote:It's good to have a little bit of lonely every now and again, makes you appreciate the not lonely times more. I have a six day lonely coming up, Mrs. Lak leaves for the UK Tuesday to go to her Gran's funeral, returns the following Monday. I'll be quite busy, though.

Use the opportunity to get blasted. Absinthe makes the heart go flounder.

Keep It Real wrote:TI replied, tongue in cheek "No no; you're always right and I'm always wrong" and he replied "No....." and I said "see? you can't win".

Skip to about 3:30

lol yup.