Tips/advice wanted
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Sendraks wrote:*content warning - comments below are from someone with limited teaching experience and who keeps his contact with children to a minimum.*
I think your approach was the right one, although I hope you explained to the student in question the importance of taking responsibility for their own actions. Someone might have handed the books to him, but he chose to hide them and he has to take responsibility for that as a would-be adult.
Sendraks wrote:I'm not sure you'd get much by way of a rationale from the children as to the why behind their behaviour. Kids do stupid and thoughtless things without thinking about the consequences or having much empathy for the target of their pranks. I'm not sure how you can teach them empathy either.
Sendraks wrote:It might be worth following up with the victim as to whether they've been harassed further following the lesson, given that kids are wonderful at misplaced aggression and will happily blame the victim for their nearly facing detention, rather than take the culprits to task.
Thomas Eshuis wrote:
Did that, using the analogy of someone giving him stolen goods.
Thomas Eshuis wrote:The guy who handed back the books said it was all a harmless joke, eventhough the victim was visibly upset, and making it clear he really did not like the situation.
Not to mention I explicitly told them to hand it back.
So even if they did not realise the distress of the victim they should have acknowledged my demand.
Thomas Eshuis wrote:I suggested to their tutor/counsellor that we have two separate talks, one with the victim and one with the culprits. I want the victim to feel safe during my lessons so I need to get an idea of his relation to the rest of the class and how we can improve the situation.
Thomas Eshuis wrote:At the same time, it needs to be made clear to the culprits that their behaviour is completely unacceptable, even if they think it's a harmless joke.
Ironclad wrote:Maybe the student who gave the books back wasn't a perpetrator at all, maybe they were 'not wanting to get involved' (hence the silence) but didn't fancy punishment for this act by other student(s). That, they simply wanted the event to pass, and only witnessed the 'theft'.
Ironclad wrote:Maybe the student who gave the books back wasn't a perpetrator at all, maybe they were 'not wanting to get involved' (hence the silence) but didn't fancy punishment for this act by other student(s). That, they simply wanted the event to pass, and only witnessed the 'theft'.
Could they be overly punished now?
Ironclad wrote:Just seems a little over the top to me, to investigate and find a single kid to punish. The threat of a blanket-punishment was plenty, but followed up with a social lesson on bullying would be just right.
Noticing the child was overly upset could help with some future interaction/intervention, but I'm not sure that hunting down the enemy is a good idea. It might create bitterness. But what do I know, I am not social worker
Ironclad wrote:Just seems a little over the top to me, to investigate and find a single kid to punish.
Ironclad wrote: The threat of a blanket-punishment was plenty, but followed up with a social lesson on bullying would be just right.
Noticing the child was overly upset could help with some future interaction/intervention, but I'm not sure that hunting down the enemy is a good idea. It might create bitterness. But what do I know, I am not social worker
UncertainSloth wrote:
with the 'tutor' (would this be form tutor, head of year?)
UncertainSloth wrote: spend the time to get to grips with the situation and dig back to its roots - only then can you start working to improve things from now on
crank wrote:Maybe I'm missing something, but how is it that more than one person is involved? Person X hides books, even if others express approval in some way, they are not 'involved' to any real extent.
crank wrote: I think you need to find out what it's like generally for the kids there. How common is bullying, how brutal can it get? Hiding someone's books is rather tame.
crank wrote: If bullying is a problem there, it won't stop without a concerted effort by the whole school.
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