Following the discussion of the American Nazi who named his kids after a few of his personal heroes, such as Adolph Hitler, Heinrich (Himmler), and Aryan Nation, I wanted to open a thread about bad names saddled upon children such as these.

So, what have you heard of? Real ones - not the fictitious "Orangejello and Lemonjello", but real screwed up names for kids to deal with? I've got a doozy, but would like to hear of a few others first.

Moon Unit and Dweezle

Had a neighbour once in renting a house beside us, who called out over the fence "Had we seen Furball". I swear that's what I heard her say...I assumed it was a cat. They'd moved in the day before. Then I saw a little kid come out from under the bushes at the back of their yard with a few plastic toy soldiers in his hand, telling mum he'd been building an "army camp". I asked her what the kids name was, and she said "Furble"...that's how it was spelt. I fucking kid you not. No idea where that name could possibly have come from, and as they only lived there a couple of weeks after her husband found work in another town, I never got the chance to find out.

Some kids names, when you hear them, just let you know the poor little bastards are in for a life of either learning to fight or being bullied mercilessly, just so the parents can feel like new age proud individualists who simply must be the center of attention...

There was that Fort Wayne, Indiana mayor Harry Baals. They backed away from naming a government building after him because of the pronunciation.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harry_Baals

And that Texas lady, Ima Hogg.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ima_Hogg

This isn't quite the same, but I've always been tickled when people's names sort of match their jobs. There was a bank here once that had a big sign on the window - a greeting from the branch manager, a Mr. Crooks. There's also a psychiatrist around here named Dr. Quirk.
http://www.novascotiadoctordirectory.ca/yarmouth/doctor-willard-quirk-1963.html

I saw an article in the local rag about a kid that won a spelling bee, his name was Lugodrian.

There's a urologist in town named Dr. Tinkle.

Then there's the candidate for city council, Richard Head.

Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/2452593/Talula-Does-The-Hula-From-Hawaii-not-a-girls-name-New-Zealand-court-rules.html

Blanket

Petal Blossom Rainbow Oliver, Buddy Bear Maurice Oliver, Poppy Honey Rosie Oliver, Daisy Boo Pamela Oliver
All Jamie Oliver's children.

Bean Bag Amerika. No joke.

Not a child's name but still:
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,367185,00.html

Peaches, Fifi Trixibelle, Pixie and Heavenly Hiraani Tiger Lily. All daughters of the late Paula Yates.

[Edit] I forgot to add Penn Jilette's daughter is called Moxie Crimefighter Jilette and Shanon Sossaman (sp?) has a child named Audio Science. Yes, you read that correctly.

Fenrir wrote:There was an Andrew Ness in high school, and his brother Peter.

Always thought those names were poor parenting decisions.

Funnily I was at school with a guy called Andrew Phillip Ness - or A.P. Ness for short. And he was.

My grandfather was a registrar in Glasgow. A man came in one day and requested the forms to change his name by deed poll. My grandfather asked what his name was - John Piddlesquint was the reply. And what did he want to change it to? James Piddlesquint.

Not a first name, but a surname...
Several years ago my mother, a real estate agent at the time, sold an apartment to a "Mr Basset". At least, that's the way he pronounced his name. But when it came to the signing of the document, she noticed that the name was actually spelled "Bastard".
And this man had kids of school-going age... who presumably had that surname listed on the class register!

Eastern Europe and Russia, especially after second world war, some girls got these names


Masinka (Mashinka) - MachineGun

Traktorka - Tractor

Elektrika - electrics

Family friends have the surname "Liss".
They always joke that they could never have named their son "Richard".

My kids are named God Dammit, and Jesus H. Christ.

I knew a guy named Ray Gunn. Legend had it that he had a brother named Tommy.

Jason Lee has a boy named Pilot "Standard" Inspektor. Kevin Smith (who has directed Lee numerous times) has a daughter named Harley Quinn.

Yeah, but Lee is also a scientologist, so...

Weaver wrote:Following the discussion of the American Nazi who named his kids after a few of his personal heroes, such as Adolph Hitler, Heinrich (Himmler), and Aryan Nation, I wanted to open a thread about bad names saddled upon children such as these.

So, what have you heard of? Real ones - not the fictitious "Orangejello and Lemonjello", but real screwed up names for kids to deal with? I've got a doozy, but would like to hear of a few others first.

Someone' s selection of weird names given to babies in the Netherlands 2012

My personal "favorites":

- Rehab
- Queen-ensiellyque
- Djzenghis
- Rolex