Requiring Competency to be Parents

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Re: Re:

#21  Postby riddlemethis » Mar 03, 2010 8:55 am

Mr.Samsa wrote:
riddlemethis wrote:
Hmmm, well, I think there are generations of successfully raised children that demonstrate this may not be the case. :scratch:

I think it again depends on our definitions of "successful"..

Yes! Wondered if you'd pick that up. ;)

Mr Samsa wrote:
riddlemethis wrote:None-the-less, a child's behaviours is simply the manifestation of the values of a family as far as I can see. The best way to promote good behaviour in children is by modeling it. Where adults behave badly, children behave badly. There also simply has to be some latitude given for the age of the child you are dealing with (which is why the program is pitched only at families with 4-12 yr olds). What I do like about Triple P is that it isn't a plan for controlling children's behaviour, it is more about controlling the parents behaviour (ie: be consistent, be clear & simple in your expectations, follow through, keep your temper), just spun in a pretty package :grin: . However, not all adults who become parents need this behaviour control & engaging the people who desperately do is going to take a bit more than an online course before they have any experience in kid-wrangling.

All valid points. Triple-P does focus on changing the environment so problem behavior doesn't occur in the first place - this is still parent training though. And it does teach parents how to correct problem behaviors when they occur. And whilst it's true that an online course won't be enough for some parents, that's why triple-P is multi-tiered giving more intensive training to those who need it.

Which becomes evident when & is decided by whom?

riddlemethis wrote:Fair enough. In that case, send 'em all to school, 'cause dogs bite.

Which is the subject of the thread and I agree! :grin:[/quote]

Quite! :mrgreen:
I told the priest, don't count on any second coming. God got his ass kicked the first time he came down here slumming. - Concrete Blonde

Reason is the servant of the passions - David Hume

You got to be Jesus crazy to pull a move like that. - Victor T
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Re: Re:

#22  Postby Mr.Samsa » Mar 03, 2010 9:05 am

riddlemethis wrote:
Yes! Wondered if you'd pick that up. ;)


riddlemethis wrote:Which becomes evident when & is decided by whom?

I can't remember how they decide; I think partly it is based on the parents putting themselves forward, on reports from teachers concerned about the child's behavior, other authorities requesting intervention etc.
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Re: Re:

#23  Postby Simon_Gardner » Mar 03, 2010 11:00 am

Mr.Samsa wrote:
Grimstad wrote:
The fact of the matter is that you have a vey strong negative OPINION of everyones parenting abilities based on your own personal experience.
No, based on my own personal opinion, well realistically I'd ignore it as anecdotal evidence is useless but if I were to accept it then I'd have a more positive view of parenting because I think my parents are great people and I know they did their best to raise me and my siblings. I had an incredibly easy life with my parents, and they were terribly good to me.

From a behavioral science perspective though, my position changes obviously as I think back on some of the things they did and realise how silly they were. I see the same with parents every day, they just have no idea of how to raise kids. And this isn't my "opinion", it's based on my knowledge of behavioral psychology and basic observation of people's parenting style. (Plus, the pragmatic assumption that the average parent hasn't had extensive training in behavioral science).

It's frustrating seeing parents in the supermarket do something to stop a behavior, or to hear parents talk to me about how they are raising a good kid, and the things they do are just cringeworthy. They'll be telling me some "cute" story about their kid and the only thing running through my head is paper after paper of scientific conclusions just screaming at how wrong they are and all the negative side effects that will occur as a result of their mistakes.

Praiseworthy as all this may be. Logical, even. it would take the most fundamental political shift for anything remotely like the compulsory training of prospective parents. It ain’t going to happen.

I note that the [English (it means something else in the States)] middle classes are notorious for believing firmly that the *right* way to raise a child is their way and the *wrong* way is the way all those feckless working class people do it. In short, it’s a class issue - bigtime.

Tread warily.
Last edited by Simon_Gardner on Mar 03, 2010 11:23 am, edited 1 time in total.
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