When we describe God using the Bible He wrote to describe himself, Christians call this "ridicule". Somehow they don't realize they are on a dark road staring into oncoming headlights.

Any other examples of this?

HUH? I'm sorry, but I've read this sentence 3 times and I'm not getting it; the title, the content, or the question.

Let me try again...

...naw, screw it.

I lied to my husband once when he asked me what I was cooking. I told him it was beef to make sandwiches. Then the lid popped off due to excessive boiling and the tongue revealed itself. Damn tongue!

Am I getting closer?

Grace,

Thanks for trying! your story is actually funnier than the OP merits.

I was trying to point out the irony of a Christian having his/her God described in detail, and that God is so ridiculous in his doings as listed in the Bible that the Christian immediately dismisses the description as "ridicule".

What if I told your husband, "Your wife is fat", and his only defense was to say "Don't make fun of her"? Well, just apply that to the Christian complaint that we often resort to mockery.

Grace wrote:I lied to my husband once when he asked me what I was cooking. I told him it was beef to make sandwiches. Then the lid popped off due to excessive boiling and the tongue revealed itself. Damn tongue!

Am I getting closer?

WT bloody F!

The story about the tongue is true. Absolutely true. I figured, 'what the hell does he know about tongue.' I was going to serve it up and after he digested it and had at least one healthy poop, I'd tell him the tongue didn't kill him after all. It didn't work out that way. He hasn't trusted me in the kitchen ever since.

Hand in cookie jar/tongue in pot... almost the same thing... well sort of.

Grace wrote:The story about the tongue is true. Absolutely true. I figured, 'what the hell does he know about tongue.' I was going to serve it up and after he digested it and had at least one healthy poop, I'd tell him the tongue didn't kill him after all. It didn't work out that way. He hasn't trusted me in the kitchen ever since.

Hand in cookie jar/tongue in pot... almost the same thing... well sort of.

If you get one which has not been pickled/salted it's a lot less obvious what it its - and nicer too. Also, a pressure cooker would stop it exposing itself!

I don't think I've ever seen pickled tongue. Sounds delightful. Is that a German thing?

Grace wrote:I don't think I've ever seen pickled tongue. Sounds delightful. Is that a German thing?

English - tongue is just about always pickled in saltpetre here before cooking or canning. There's a tendency to overdo it though and it can become hard. I don't know how long butchers pickle them for, but we used to soak one (beef) overnight in water to get rid of excess salt before we cooked it, when we had a family to feed. Then it would be pressed with some gelatin gravy in a pan under something heavy. in the fridge for another night. Then sliced and yummy! Not many people cook their own now, alas. Probably can't wait two and a half hours, never mind days.

Interesting.