rationalskepticism.org

Animavore wrote:For myself death is the can I keep kicking down the road.

In my life I've had quite a few people die on me on the last couple of years and I feel kind of ashamed of how quickly I get over it. Pretty much once they're in the hole that's the event over for me. Maybe just none of them were close enough to me.

I think age has something to do with it too. We recovered quite quickly from my husband's sister's death from Covid, while I clearly remember being in a bit of a state for months after my sister died 21 years ago. (I can't believe it's that long ago). I was in the middle of preparations for my Psychology degree finals, and simply couldn't. I actually walked out of the exam room two months after her death in floods of tears, writing on my exam paper that I wasn't fit to do my best work.I asked the university to redo the exam in January, they agreed, and even then, it wasn't my best work. When I passed the Ancient History courses (we need two majors for a Bachelors degree), I'd started from the beginning after finishing Psychology because I didn't want to do third year Sociology which had been my major, so I waited for them to tell me to redo the final year of Psychology in order to graduate. When I sent in the application, they returned that they'd assessed my work in my Psychology and Ancient History courses, and based on my analysis of Constantine's character and my assertions about his "conversion", they'd decided my knowledge of Psychology was good enough for a pass, so they gave me the degree. By this time I was into my 60s and really tired of studying, also I couldn't go further for a Master's because I simply couldn't do the classical language requirement, so I gave it up, because I was learning more from Cali and Hackenslash than I could from the university, and they didn't need me to learn another language. Seriously though, I was just tired, enjoyed this place a lot more than I should've, writing dozens of posts a day, and arguing about everything I thought I knew, I also didn't have the time for all the reading I would've needed to do. I doubt though that I would ever have mastered Classical Greek, especially after I'd tried recovering what I'd learnt of Latin at high school, five decades earlier.

But yes to get back on topic, I do find that accepting our own approaching deaths has made it easier for me to accept that my now eldest sister is living her last days. She's almost 82, and has serious heart problems. I actually thought we'd lose her five years ago when she had a major episode with her heart. Now she's only gone out twice in the last year, for vaccinations, nothing else. Her daughter does her shopping for her, and cares for her, helping her wash and dress and so on. So I'm prepared, and while it will provoke some sad posts, I'm ok with it. The other sister older than I am, now turning 80, I gave up on her long ago - she's insane, I can't deal with that.