Posted: Dec 21, 2017 7:35 am
by Keep It Real
Hung out with a relatively new friend yesterday round his yard. He'd sent me a text in the morning telling me he feels suicidal. I asked why, and he replied "Christmas". I sent back "It'll pass and many people find it deeply depressing so ur far from alone. Just think of it like going to the dentist." He asked me to go round so I did in the afternoon and we had a few beers. He showed me the hook he'd screwed into the ceiling to hang himself from earlier in the day. I told him I was tempted to call the crisis team, but he flatly denied that was necessary, but he did put their number in his phone and we agreed to speak on the phone X-mas day. He will be spending it physically alone.

He told me the tragic elements of the story of his life. It was all he could think about - as if Christmas had flushed up all these memories/truths and were drilling them home. In care homes since the age of 8. Hasn't spoken to his mum for circa 20 years. Hasn't spoken to his son for circa 15 years and his ex changed his name by deed-poll to extirpate his surname from him. His uncle died in his arms. Can't get off methadone and had a bag the other day too. Severe and genuine grievances no doubt and Christmas dredged them up and brought them to consciousness from memory.

He's not the brightest fellow; but seems well meaning. Occasionally he would say "but how is that my fault?" and I replied "it's not your fault" again and again with emphasis; drilling it home. I also drilled home the word optimism; and that life isn't all bad and to not focus on just the bad stuff - listing the many good things in life and his life in particular. I also said he needs to get a laptop so he can socialise online properly and that would ameliorate some of his profound loneliness. I also said a lot of things circa "that must be really difficult man, I feel for you, that really sucks for you, poor you" as my mother has taught me. Hope he makes it to the 26th.