Posted: Jun 15, 2016 1:45 am
by don't get me started
DougC wrote:If you want fancy, Japan is where it's at.

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Indeed Doug, these fancy contraptions (know as 'Washlet' toilets) are a widespread thing and most modern houses have them.
They have warmed seats, and a nozzle that extends after you have spattered the pan and then squirts a jet of water up yer hoop, with pressure and temperature adjustment controls....oooooh, heaven.
I have inadvertently given myself an enema whilst manipulating the pressure controls. My god, I was cleaned outside and in. I swear that a plastic toy soldier I swallowed when I was 5 got flushed out. (Airfix 1/72 German infantryman).

I gotta hand it to you Doug, good scatological stories, well told. :thumbup:

I know some people don't care for such humour, but when it's done well, it can be the funniest thing. The closest I have come to a heart attack was a friend regaling us in the pub of a misadventure on a Japanese beach after a night of beer an curry and a very distressed scuba diver who popped his head up at just the wrong moment.

I have to reflect that the papers that I have had published in academic journals have probably been read by a very limited audience but the letter that I had published in Viz Comic detailing a scatological episode has undoubtedly had the widest readership of anything I've ever written. :roll: