Can you have friends of the opposite sex?

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Re: Can you have friends of the opposite sex?

#61  Postby virphen » Jun 16, 2013 9:55 pm

LucidFlight wrote:
I wonder if this is because females are like cats, whereas males are like dogs. Cats tend to be more territorial and defensive, whereas dogs hunt together in packs. That is not to say I haven't spotted a pride of females out on the hunt, Friday and Saturday nights down at the local nightclub, but you don't want to get competing prides together in too small a space or they start arching their backs and hissing. Next thing you know, you've got a cat fight on your hands. Wreowr!

Guys, on the other hand, will go around in large packs, sensing out the weakest and most inexperienced animals to hunt, tracking them for long periods, until they submit to the dominant force of the alpha dog and its buddies. Also, a friendly dog is more likely to roll over and let you pat his tummy. Cats, meanwhile, prefer their hair to be stroked gently, and then they go to the cat toilet with their other cat friend to preen themselves and talk about you in their special cat-talk. Meow meow meow!


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Re: Can you have friends of the opposite sex?

#62  Postby mindhack » Jun 16, 2013 9:57 pm

I Punch Your Face wrote:
Doubtdispelled wrote:
I Punch Your Face wrote:I've had this exact same conversation with many women, and only 1 has accused me of being sexist (while sort of agreeing at the same time, which was weird).

You must know some very strange women.


I know women from various walks of life. They're not strange at all. It's actually bizarre how things which are common knowledge are denied on internet forums.


It's common knowledge that women are insincere in their relations?
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Re: Can you have friends of the opposite sex?

#63  Postby Doubtdispelled » Jun 16, 2013 10:00 pm

mindhack wrote:
I Punch Your Face wrote:
Doubtdispelled wrote:
I Punch Your Face wrote:I've had this exact same conversation with many women, and only 1 has accused me of being sexist (while sort of agreeing at the same time, which was weird).

You must know some very strange women.


I know women from various walks of life. They're not strange at all. It's actually bizarre how things which are common knowledge are denied on internet forums.


It's common knowledge that women are insincere in their relations?

Strange, isn't it, that we seem to be the last to learn this valuable nugget?

I wonder if his girlfriend will be along shortly to confirm what he says.

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Re: Can you have friends of the opposite sex?

#64  Postby Doubtdispelled » Jun 16, 2013 10:04 pm

I Punch Your Face wrote:I know women from various walks of life.

I don't think you actually know any women at all, strange or otherwise.

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Re: Can you have friends of the opposite sex?

#65  Postby I Punch Your Face » Jun 16, 2013 10:06 pm



My link is from a psychology website, and it's about friendships between women. Your link is cnn, and it's about dating.
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Re: Can you have friends of the opposite sex?

#66  Postby I Punch Your Face » Jun 16, 2013 10:09 pm

Doubtdispelled wrote:
I Punch Your Face wrote:I know women from various walks of life.

I don't think you actually know any women at all, strange or otherwise.

:coffee:


I do. My boss is a woman, a lot of the people who work with me are women, I have female friends, and I'm acquainted with the girlfriends of some of my friends, and I have a girlfriend myself, and I'm acquainted with her friends. I've had this same conversation with many of them, and the majority will admit, one way or another, that women are not as sincere in their friendships with each other as men are.
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Re: Can you have friends of the opposite sex?

#67  Postby mindhack » Jun 16, 2013 10:16 pm

A quick search resulted in this article where expectations in friendships were researched.

The abstract:

Friendship expectations are prescriptive normative behaviors and highly valued qualities in ideal same-sex friends. This paper reports the results of five meta-analyses of sex differences from 37 manuscripts (36 samples, N = 8825). A small difference favoring females was detected in overall friendship expectations (d = .17). Friendship expectations were higher for females in three of four categories: symmetrical reciprocity (e.g., loyalty, genuineness; d = .17), communion (e.g., self-disclosure, intimacy; d = .39), solidarity (e.g., mutual activities, companionship; d = .03), but agency (e.g., physical fitness, status; d = -.34) was higher in males. Overall expectations and symmetrical reciprocity showed small effect sizes. Medium effect sizes for communion favoring females and for agency favoring males support predictions of evolutionary theory.

The cunts must have a problem with men then I guess :shifty:
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Re: Can you have friends of the opposite sex?

#68  Postby I Punch Your Face » Jun 16, 2013 10:21 pm

mindhack wrote:A quick search resulted in this article where expectations in friendships were researched.

The abstract:

Friendship expectations are prescriptive normative behaviors and highly valued qualities in ideal same-sex friends. This paper reports the results of five meta-analyses of sex differences from 37 manuscripts (36 samples, N = 8825). A small difference favoring females was detected in overall friendship expectations (d = .17). Friendship expectations were higher for females in three of four categories: symmetrical reciprocity (e.g., loyalty, genuineness; d = .17), communion (e.g., self-disclosure, intimacy; d = .39), solidarity (e.g., mutual activities, companionship; d = .03), but agency (e.g., physical fitness, status; d = -.34) was higher in males. Overall expectations and symmetrical reciprocity showed small effect sizes. Medium effect sizes for communion favoring females and for agency favoring males support predictions of evolutionary theory.

The cunts must have a problem with men then I guess :shifty:


Why is it sexist when I say something about female friendships, but when you do, it's not? Does "sexist" mean "never critical of any aspect of women, ever, no matter what"?
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Re: Can you have friends of the opposite sex?

#69  Postby Doubtdispelled » Jun 16, 2013 10:21 pm

I Punch Your Face wrote:My link is from a psychology website

:rofl:
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Re: Can you have friends of the opposite sex?

#70  Postby mindhack » Jun 16, 2013 10:27 pm

I Punch Your Face wrote:
mindhack wrote:A quick search resulted in this article where expectations in friendships were researched.

The abstract:

Friendship expectations are prescriptive normative behaviors and highly valued qualities in ideal same-sex friends. This paper reports the results of five meta-analyses of sex differences from 37 manuscripts (36 samples, N = 8825). A small difference favoring females was detected in overall friendship expectations (d = .17). Friendship expectations were higher for females in three of four categories: symmetrical reciprocity (e.g., loyalty, genuineness; d = .17), communion (e.g., self-disclosure, intimacy; d = .39), solidarity (e.g., mutual activities, companionship; d = .03), but agency (e.g., physical fitness, status; d = -.34) was higher in males. Overall expectations and symmetrical reciprocity showed small effect sizes. Medium effect sizes for communion favoring females and for agency favoring males support predictions of evolutionary theory.

The cunts must have a problem with men then I guess :shifty:


Why is it sexist when I say something about female friendships, but when you do, it's not? Does "sexist" mean "never critical of any aspect of women, ever, no matter what"?

Huh, I'm sexist? Where?

Any comment on the article's abstract? It does say women score higher in their espectation of loyalty, genuineness, intimacy and solidarity. I would say that flushes your assertions about female insincerity down the toilet.
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Re: Can you have friends of the opposite sex?

#71  Postby I Punch Your Face » Jun 16, 2013 10:38 pm

mindhack wrote:
I Punch Your Face wrote:
mindhack wrote:A quick search resulted in this article where expectations in friendships were researched.

The abstract:

Friendship expectations are prescriptive normative behaviors and highly valued qualities in ideal same-sex friends. This paper reports the results of five meta-analyses of sex differences from 37 manuscripts (36 samples, N = 8825). A small difference favoring females was detected in overall friendship expectations (d = .17). Friendship expectations were higher for females in three of four categories: symmetrical reciprocity (e.g., loyalty, genuineness; d = .17), communion (e.g., self-disclosure, intimacy; d = .39), solidarity (e.g., mutual activities, companionship; d = .03), but agency (e.g., physical fitness, status; d = -.34) was higher in males. Overall expectations and symmetrical reciprocity showed small effect sizes. Medium effect sizes for communion favoring females and for agency favoring males support predictions of evolutionary theory.

The cunts must have a problem with men then I guess :shifty:


Why is it sexist when I say something about female friendships, but when you do, it's not? Does "sexist" mean "never critical of any aspect of women, ever, no matter what"?

Huh, I'm sexist? Where?

Any comment on the article's abstract? It does say women score higher in their espectation of loyalty, genuineness, intimacy and solidarity. I would say that flushes your assertions about female insincerity down the toilet.


No one said you're sexist. But I am, right? Because I'm stating a different opinion. Your quote says that women are better friends, but my link says otherwise, and because of that, I'm supposed to be the one who is sexist. If you really think that women have better friendship qualities than men, that's fine, but it doesn't make you sexist, but by the same token what I said doesn't make me sexist either. And yet, I'm called sexist simply because I said something critical of women. How come it's ok for you to say what you're saying, and it doesn't make you sexist, yet when I say what I said, I'm sexist?
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Re: Can you have friends of the opposite sex?

#72  Postby mindhack » Jun 16, 2013 10:42 pm

I Punch Your Face wrote:
mindhack wrote:
I Punch Your Face wrote:
mindhack wrote:A quick search resulted in this article where expectations in friendships were researched.

The abstract:

Friendship expectations are prescriptive normative behaviors and highly valued qualities in ideal same-sex friends. This paper reports the results of five meta-analyses of sex differences from 37 manuscripts (36 samples, N = 8825). A small difference favoring females was detected in overall friendship expectations (d = .17). Friendship expectations were higher for females in three of four categories: symmetrical reciprocity (e.g., loyalty, genuineness; d = .17), communion (e.g., self-disclosure, intimacy; d = .39), solidarity (e.g., mutual activities, companionship; d = .03), but agency (e.g., physical fitness, status; d = -.34) was higher in males. Overall expectations and symmetrical reciprocity showed small effect sizes. Medium effect sizes for communion favoring females and for agency favoring males support predictions of evolutionary theory.

The cunts must have a problem with men then I guess :shifty:


Why is it sexist when I say something about female friendships, but when you do, it's not? Does "sexist" mean "never critical of any aspect of women, ever, no matter what"?

Huh, I'm sexist? Where?

Any comment on the article's abstract? It does say women score higher in their espectation of loyalty, genuineness, intimacy and solidarity. I would say that flushes your assertions about female insincerity down the toilet.


No one said you're sexist. But I am, right? Because I'm stating a different opinion. Your quote says that women are better friends, but my link says otherwise, and because of that, I'm supposed to be the one who is sexist. If you really think that women have better friendship qualities than men, that's fine, but it doesn't make you sexist, but by the same token what I said doesn't make me sexist either. And yet, I'm called sexist simply because I said something critical of women. How come it's ok for you to say what you're saying, and it doesn't make you sexist, yet when I say what I said, I'm sexist?


Well, maybe it's just a word-thing. Maybe you aren't sexist. Who am I to judge?

I do find it odd you say it's supposedly common knowledge that women are insincere in their relations. I find that hard to believe without further substantiation.
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Re: Can you have friends of the opposite sex?

#73  Postby SafeAsMilk » Jun 16, 2013 10:44 pm

Doubtdispelled wrote:
I Punch Your Face wrote:My link is from a psychology website

:rofl:

Yes, I too was impressed with that link's extensive citing of its claims. Very authoritative, what with "Psychology" in the title and all. Perhaps I can find another page on their site where it suggests wearing funny hats to calm down tense arguments with your significant other :think:
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Re: Can you have friends of the opposite sex?

#74  Postby Doubtdispelled » Jun 16, 2013 10:47 pm

I Punch Your Face wrote:Your quote says that women are better friends, but my link says otherwise

In the interests of clarity, could you please point out and/or quote just where what you linked to says what you are claiming it says?

This is leaving aside for the moment the small matter of your link leading to nothing more than a pop-psychology pulp magazine, rather than any kind of peer-reviewed research.
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Re: Can you have friends of the opposite sex?

#75  Postby kiore » Jun 16, 2013 10:53 pm

Doubtdispelled wrote:
I Punch Your Face wrote:Your quote says that women are better friends, but my link says otherwise

In the interests of clarity, could you please point out and/or quote just where what you linked to says what you are claiming it says?

This is leaving aside for the moment the small matter of your link leading to nothing more than a pop-psychology pulp magazine, rather than any kind of peer-reviewed research.


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Re: Can you have friends of the opposite sex?

#77  Postby Doubtdispelled » Jun 16, 2013 10:57 pm

kiore wrote:
Doubtdispelled wrote:
I Punch Your Face wrote:Your quote says that women are better friends, but my link says otherwise

In the interests of clarity, could you please point out and/or quote just where what you linked to says what you are claiming it says?

This is leaving aside for the moment the small matter of your link leading to nothing more than a pop-psychology pulp magazine, rather than any kind of peer-reviewed research.


I Punch Your Face has been banned as a sock puppet so will not be answering this question with this name...

Well I never! I'm so disappointed....

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Re: Can you have friends of the opposite sex?

#78  Postby Scot Dutchy » Jun 17, 2013 1:50 pm

You always get a feeling about some posters that they are not going to be around a long time. :think:
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Re: Can you have friends of the opposite sex?

#79  Postby PCS » Jun 17, 2013 6:57 pm

Delvo wrote:This isn't even really a question at all. The truth that of course it's obviously possible, and in fact quite common and routine, is so utterly indisputable and beyond doubt that it makes me wonder what in the world some people think could be the point in pretending to think it's impossible or even might be. It's the kind of lie that's so ridiculous it can't even be meant to actually fool anybody because nobody could be fooled by it.

The only potential answer I've come up with so far has to do with the fact that the person they accuse of thinking this way is always the man, never the woman, despite the fact that other common claims about the alleged differences between the two would inevitably mean it has to be the other way around. It fits in with our culture's general obsession with man-bashing, constantly coming up with a stream of ways to ascribe one bad thing after another to men and depict men as worthless sociopathic scum.


I think it may have been better if I had titled the post in a different way as opposed to a question, I wasn't really questioning it myself. I was asking the question just to see what the answers here would be. I agree with you the question in itself is stupid, but when this discussion was going on at my work, I was the only one of 4 people arguing the case that a of course a friendship is possible between a man and a woman, they were just saying I was mad. That is the main reason I wrote this post here, I was surprised by my colleagues attitude.

EDIT: Spelling which completely changes meaning of what I was trying to say
Last edited by PCS on Jun 17, 2013 7:12 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Can you have friends of the opposite sex?

#80  Postby PCS » Jun 17, 2013 7:01 pm

Scot Dutchy wrote:
mindhack wrote:
Scot Dutchy wrote:I think it is a stupid question.

Ofcourse you can have friends with any sex and you also can have sex with any sex what is the problem. I had a realtionship for years with a girl/woman. After many years we met up again and had we were still very good friends but we had realised years ago as a couple we would be useless. We used to sleep together but no sex it just did not suit us. She was very attractive but there was no spark.

Why do so many people have hang ups about sex?

There are no pre-conditions only in some peoples minds.

I'm used to being around women from an early age on. From early childhood I remember having girls as friends, which was something sometimes being frowned upon by my fellow male friends. During puberty it wasn't much different. Heck, we had a nice bunch of people gathering often, as friends, we had sleepovers, and all that. Mostly without sex, mostly :lol:


Do you think it is an anglo-saxon hang up again?


I would say it is a cultural phenomenon as I sort of mentioned in the OP.

As James said:
...And there's the problem. I think men and women can be friends, but the rest of the world seem to be suspicious when they are seen alone together. It can be more hassle than its worth. It shouldn't be, but... :think:
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