It's Me

[Sgt Kelly]

Assuming that your son isn't an unreasonable domineering asshole to her as well, I would also advise to go through your daughter in law. She has as much say over their children as he does and she can decide otherwise.

Somehow though, I get the feeling that the chances are slim.

Somehow, also, I have a feeling she might end up on your doorstep one day.

[theropod_V_2.0]

Oh, there’s a back story at work here, Spear. His mother and I divorced under extreme conditions. I had just returned to Oregon from a trip to Arkansas when my mom had bypass surgery. That was 1979 when such procedures were risky as hell. I got back to our apartment, checked on my sleeping kids, and opened the door to my bedroom only to find her and a “friend” of mine doin the wild thing. The guy jumped over to the side of the bed away from me. My ex didn’t even cover herself, but instead turned and looked at the Ruger Blackhawk 44 mag that lived on the headboard. For an instant she seriously considered blowing me in half. I backed out and left without saying a word.

From that point on she did everything she could to make my life a living hell. I was serving a 5 year probation for a charge of attempted murder on a Oregon police office, which 2 years in was altered to reckless endangerment because of a late ruling from the court. However before that happened she blackmailed me. She threatened to fabricate evidence, and plant drugs, so that I would spend the rest of my natural life in prison if I didn’t allow her new lover to adopt my kids. That Ruger pistol was a very real violation of the conditions of my probation, and she knew my fingerprints were all over it. She knew she had me by the short hairs. Had she pulled that shit today I would have went straight to my PO and told him everything. Then I was an emotional wreck, and rational thought escaped me. So, I folded. She then spent years brainwashing those kids to hate me. My son told me that all that was in the past, but apparently all it took to retrieve those programmed hate emotions was to dare challenge his views. As long as I was a bump on a log it was all good.

So, your suggestion is meritorious, and I may try that, but I’m afraid any such effort is a waste of yet more emotional investment. I had to block his mother-in-law from my Facebook page for constantly tagging me to look at right wing memes, and most were sheer hate filled lies. His father-in-law said Bernie should be taken out and shot, and that he would volunteer. Like Kilo Ren his journey to the dark side is complete, even if he might be torn. Shitty analogy, I know.

Time may fix things, but I’m not likely to live more than a decade, if that. If I invest even more of my emotion with little hope of success it very well cut down what time I have left because of the sheer stress of this. Either way I’m not inclined to make myself a target for yet more abuse. Considering the right wing extremism displayed by my daughter-in-law’s parents, the chances are she agrees with my son, and is an”good Christian woman” that submits to her husband, like Bible commands.

My plan is to let some time pass and see if he comes to his senses. Maybe a year of more, and if he remains obstinate I can live with it, maybe.

RS

[Spearthrower]

Ugh is about the only appropriate thing to say.

[Rachel Bronwyn]

Sounds like he'd just take offense to the suggestion he was trying to punish his father. Probably thinks he's doing right by his kids, keeping them from their grandparent.

It just sucks. So sorry, theropod. I know grandparents have limited legal right to time and access to their grandkids here but having to go that route, likely worsening an already toxic relationship with their parent, would be horrible.

I just lost my grandpa. He was a huge presence in my life as a kid and loved me so much. Where that relationship is available, I want it for every kid.

[theropod_V_2.0]

The stupid part of this is just before my Dad died he and my brother got into a verbal knock down drag out row. He and dad never talked again. My son and I talked about that extensively, and he boldly proclaimed that he would never lose his cool with me. This was before Turnip. The toxicity of the agenda to make any liberal thinking equate to commie pinko treason has taken him. It’s just that simple. He see’s me as an enemy of the state. Seriously.

RS

[Ironclad]

Crikey, Boneh! You have some wild stories!!

[theropod_V_2.0]

Maybe folks will not be so skeptical when I say I’ve lived more in one lifetime than most men could with three. Grand highs and lows, with stupendous successes and abysmal failures. I’ve done all sorts of work from shoveling cow shit to preparing tyrannosaur fossils. I’ve broken bones and suffer traumatic wounds. I’ve crawled through human waste in a steaming jungle to catch a word of Slavic where it should never be spoken. I’ve achieved mastery in wood working to the point of installing a huge hand made parquet floor in Winthrop Rockefeller’s private office. I’ve been shot at more than once, had motor vehicle wrecks that should have killed me and learned a few programming languages. I’ve mined placer gold by hand for 9 months high in the Cascade mountains, and found tiny rough diamonds here in Arkansas. I’ve pastored a Baptist church, and I’ve been a fool and a genius in the same day. I’ve lost in love on a major way (see above) and found the best partner possible. I’ve had my nose absolutely smashed by a hulk of a man, and felled similar giants with blinding fast moves. Mistakes were more common than getting it right, but I did learn to learn from those errors, and strive daily to remember those jagged edges.

In the end, I have few regrets. Mostly I wish I had applied myself to my schooling more deeply, and settled on paleontology when I was learning such things as ancient greek to better understand mythology.

RS

[jamest]

I didn't get on with my dad. He died when I was 24. My mum died when I was 20 and I loved her.

My greatest regret? Well, two of them are that I had a mum and a dad, for that fucked me up on many levels. Plato's Republic, anyone?

[The_Metatron]

[quote="theropod_V_2.0";p="2732986"]Maybe folks will not be so skeptical when I say I’ve lived more in one lifetime than most men could with three. Grand highs and lows, with stupendous successes and abysmal failures. I’ve done all sorts of work from shoveling cow shit to preparing tyrannosaur fossils. I’ve broken bones and suffer traumatic wounds. I’ve crawled through human waste in a steaming jungle to catch a word of Slavic where it should never be spoken. I’ve achieved mastery in wood working to the point of installing a huge hand made parquet floor in Winthrop Rockefeller’s private office. I’ve been shot at more than once, had motor vehicle wrecks that should have killed me and learned a few programming languages. I’ve mined placer gold by hand for 9 months high in the Cascade mountains, and found tiny rough diamonds here in Arkansas. I’ve pastored a Baptist church, and I’ve been a fool and a genius in the same day. I’ve lost in love on a major way (see above) and found the best partner possible. I’ve had my nose absolutely smashed by a hulk of a man, and felled similar giants with blinding fast moves. Mistakes were more common than getting it right, but I did learn to learn from those errors, and strive daily to remember those jagged edges.

In the end, I have few regrets. Mostly I wish I had applied myself to my schooling more deeply, and settled on paleontology when I was learning such things as ancient greek to better understand mythology.

RS[/quote]
Hell, I've only done a few of those things. Owing to my youth, of course.

[The_Metatron]

Glad to see you around.

[theropod_V_2.0]

Good to be here, and free of the life suck that is Facebook.

RS